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The thing to remember, when you go to bed
Is hang strings of garlic, high over your head,
So werewolves and vampires won't come to call.

In fact,
You won't get many callers at all
'Cause garlic is smelly.
Besides,
its success with magical creatures
Who visit distress on humans who read scary stories at night,
And sleep in their bedrooms, without a night-light.

The thing to remember, when you go to bed
Is putting a cross, at your foot and your head,
'Cause witches and vampire bats are religious
And touching a sign like a cross gives them hideous
Goosebumps and warts,
Hives, the welts and the itches,
Which nobody likes, even vampire bats and witches.
But try not to toss or to turn in your bed.
If you kick off the crosses you're gonna wake the dead.

The thing to remember, when you go to bed
Is watch out for goblins, who'll munch on your head.
What stops them is water, so ask for a glass,
Then pour it around, so the goblins can't pass.
Or else make a run
for the bathroom and turn on the hot and cold faucets
and watch goblins squirm.
As a last chance,
since goblins all fear running streams,
If you don't own a bathroom, dream water-filled dreams.

So, that's my advice.
Now, just turn off the light.
Hope you sleep well the next Halloween Night!