Why did the police arrest the turkey?
They suspected it of fowl play!
What would you get if you crossed Thanksgiving and Easter?
What did the turkey say before it was roasted?
Boy! I'm stuffed!
Why was the dog chasing the band in the Thanksgiving parade?
He wanted to bury the trombones!
Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?
Why did the Pilgrim eat a candle?
He wanted a light snack!
"I was going to serve sweet potatoes with Thanksgiving dinner, but I sat on them.
"So what are you serving now?"
Gobbler said, "Doctor, help me! I can't stop acting like a turkey!"
"I see," said the doctor. "How long have you had this problem?"
"Let me think a second. Mom laid the egg in 1954..."
Teacher: "Where did the Pilgrims come from?"
Student: "Their parents, of course!"
"You know an ancestor of mine came over on the Mayflower."
"Really? Which rat was he?"
How does a Turkey drink her wine?
In a gobble-let
What do turkeys like to do on sunny days?
They like to go on a peck-nic.
What did General Patton do on Thanksgiving?
He gave tanks.
What do turkeys use to clean themselves?
They use "feather dusters"!
What do you get when you cross a turkey with an octopus?
Enough drumsticks for Thanksgiving.
What's black and white and red all over?
A Pilgrim with a rash!
Why did the Pilgrims eat turkey on Thanksgiving?
They couldn't get the moose in the oven!
Why did the turkey eat his meal so quickly?
Because he was a gobbler.
What was the main thing the Pilgrims did during the first winter?
Why did Johnny get such low grades after Thanksgiving?
Because everything is marked down after the holidays.
What did the monster say to the Thanksgiving turkey?
"Pleased to eat you!"
What did the little turkey say to the big turkey?
"Peck" on someone your own size!
What do you get after eating way too much turkey and dressing?
Dessert, of course!